Finally, our beloved editor is temporarily away from The Contrarian Headquarters. No more need to worry about grammarical correctability. I get to type the normal typing way when I wasn’t last time too for the one you had, isn’t she?
On a serious note, I do want to light the figurative candle for Tim Russert. I’ve seen him give some good interviews over the years. And, on Sundays I used to occasionally catch Meet the Press, an appropriate opening act for the far superior McLaughlin Group. Tim Russert, you may now Meet the Worms. Is that inappropriate?
June has been sterile so far. I’m afraid my typical adventure-mongering has been thwarted by ridiculous academic obligations. I will be in Paris soon checking out a, previously unseen, exhibition of Aleister Crowley’s paintings. More to come.
There’s been exciting news over here in Holland. I swear, I’m not making any of the following up. 193 Pitbull Terriers are going to be "released" due to the recently overturned ban on "dangerous" pets. If the owners want their confiscated-canines back, the dogs must first pass a "behaviour" test. I love this country.
Also, a nearby island named Texel has been given the go-ahead to gas 6,000 Greylag geese. Apparently, the geese have been destroying farmland. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, eh? What? Fucking clever. Too bad they can’t imprison the 6,000 geese, and instead of releasing deadly gas they unleash 193 delinquent, blood-thirsty pitbulls–televised, of course.
The winner of the Dutch Headline Competition, hands down, is this one: "Offal Causes Jams on A1 Northbound." What an awful waste of waste. Traffic accidents are often tragic, but they’re so common they’re rather tripe affairs. Oh, just kidneying…kidding, I mean kidding. I almost butchered that one. Hot damn.
Although I’m not much of a sports fan, I have seen some fucking awesome football matches in the past week. Holland scored some top-notch goals against Italy and France (both teams from the 2006 World Cup final). They’re in the quarter finals now, regardless of what happens on Tuesday when they play Romania. It’s been very orange over here.
That’s all I’ve got.