The following is a little experiment. I’ve been thinking for a while that it would be fun to post occasional rants from a “real live conservative” to counter the ever-present librul/socialist/commie/fascist slant on these digital pages.
Certainly, it could foster discussion and spark a lively debate. Still, I gotta tell you that as an editor, it’s really hard to read an oppositional argument and not want to discredit it, line by line, as I tidy the text for publication. But that’s what the comments section is for. I encourage you to use it. (I know I will!)
Today’s post comes from our friend Chris Stecher, a feisty, freedom-loving conservative whose arguments on Facebook I have the enjoyment of regularly invalidating. Even though he’s dead wrong on a whole spate of stuff — from media rules to the myth of the free market’s “invisible hand” — he’s got heart and a great sense of humor. So let’s give him his due as he talks out his ass about Super Bowl ad buys, abortion, homosexuality and the Supreme Court.
His bio follows the post.
Let’s Talk Super Bowl. Or more specifically Super Bowl commercials, a subject about which I can speak with some authority, having spent most of my adult life (such as it is) working in advertising and marketing.
In my biz, the Super Bowl is the Holiest of Holies. The prime rib. The most treasured of ad buys. The white whale of product marketing. In recent years, a 30-second slot during gametime would run you upwards of four million bucks. And, economic downturn aside, you’d currently have to shell out two million and change for a spot.
This year, CBS has been getting a lot of heat running a pro-life advertisement during the Super Bowl. (Some might say that negative press is still good press, and I’m inclined to agree.) The ad features Tim Tebow, a Heisman trophy-winning quarterback for the Florida Gators. As the story goes, Tebow’s mother had been faced with a difficult pregnancy and was advised to have an abortion. To which she said (my words not hers), “fuck you.” A good decision, as it turned out. Because despite the “expert opinion” on her pregnancy, Tim not only survived, but flourished. I see it as another example of the left wing, pro-abortion sect getting it wrong. I have other examples of this, but we’ll have to save them for another time. [Ed’s note: the Tebow story is highly suspect; read more here.]
Of course, there are other ads that oddly enough will not be seen at this year’s Super Bowl. I’m gonna come right out and say that one of them is, well, gay. Not SUPER gay, mind you. More like the guy down the hall from your office gay. He doesn’t flaunt his orientation, but you know because at that last after-work party he showed up with a guy named Doug — both dressed immaculately — and talked about vacationing at Fire Island. So, yeah, that level of gay.
I had the opportunity to see all the ads that got axed by the NFL. As a conservative, I was prepared to have the ManCrunch.com ad piss me off. I’d braced myself for some crazy, in-your-face, dude-on-dude session. This would have given me the opportunity to grill all my gay friends about how they put their lifestyle in our faces, and therefore should expect a certain level of indignation.
I saw none of that. What I did see was an ad that should not, on any level, piss anyone off. I saw gay camp (as in “campy” camp, not a place with rentable canoes). I saw a poorly produced spot. I did not see an ad that CBS said no to for absolutely stupid reasons. Bottom line: this commercial should never have been refused if said advertisers were able to pony up the cash. Period.
Now, lets go look at the law for a second. The Supreme Court recently rendered a decision on campaign financing, with its rationale for overturning restrictions based in the First Amendment right to speech. Or in this case, a corporation’s right to “speak” using cash as its vocal cords. Now, I happen to believe that if you or your corporation have money, then you should be free to make whatever contributions you want to the candidate or campaign of your choosing.
I look at it this way: if you like a candidate and you want to help out, you can spend your time doing so. (Maybe if you are unemployed you don’t have this time, but whatever.)
Maybe you’re a business. Or maybe you’re rich but you don’t have the sort of time needed to volunteer or otherwise offer your services. But you still want your voice heard. So you offer what you do have: money. In place of boots-on-the ground or phone bank work, cash is what you have to give. This helps the people on your side (well, paid people, anyway) speak for you.
But I digress. We were talking about advertising. Which, is, interestingly enough, almost the same conversation. In the upcoming off-year elections advertising is going to (as it always does) come into play. And I, for one, love it! Part of it is the fact that I am not only an advertising junkie, but a political one as well. Where others might bemoan the ceaseless (and some would say mindless) chatter that is radio, TV and print buys, I eat it up.
Why? Because, this my friends, is AMERICA. We have a neat, democratic style of government. We get to, from time to time, vote! This is a gift we have! Yet sadly, a majority of American citizens during major elections treat this gift like a holiday fruitcake your aunt gave you for Christmas. Let me put it more plainly: they shit on the gift.
There are men and women, putting their lives on the line in foreign theaters for the simple right to be able to choose the leaders of your town, county, state and country… yet you CANT BE BOTHERED to VOTE?
Again, I digress. Back to the Bowl: if my side gets to put an ad on the air that’s anti-abortion (which I support), then the left should be free can air an ad promoting gay sex, or whatever the hell they want. (I would’ve thought they’d prefer an anti-fur or a pro-abortion spot, but whatever.)
It is free fucking speech. That’s our country. Its what we fight for, and its why, when we wake up in the morning, we can drink our coffee, look at the news and appreciate what we have.
Chris Stecher has worked most of his “adult” life working in the field of advertising and marketing, when he wasn’t doing other odd jobs such as executive chef, craps player, taxi driver, and professional grifter. All of this with only two years of college in Hawaii. He now enjoys a life of semi-retirement, working for a small-town newspaper in a rural ski mountain village, and living with his 3 birds. Interested parties can seek him out to hear him tell his tales for the cost of a Mr. James Daniels on the rocks.