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“As the oily fish spit out their oily prey…”

Posted by Katie Ehlers on Sun, May 30, 2010

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  I hereby declare “Cellz” the official song of the BP disastrophe. DOOM, with a little help from ol’ Charles Bukowski. Other nominees? Submit ‘em in the comments.

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No Love Lost: Breaking Up With the Worst Best Show on Television

Posted by Katie Ehlers on Fri, May 21, 2010

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I remember the ads for the premiere of “Lost.” Network television was a wasteland that year — and I mean even wastelandier than usual. (Here’s the network schedule from 2002-2003, the season before “Lost” premiered in fall 2004. The highest-rated shows are highlighted. Now do you believe me?) I wasn’t interested in “Lost.” It looked to me like a [...]

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Decisions I Decided: A Message from George W. Bush

Posted by Katie Ehlers on Mon, Apr 26, 2010

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What up ya’ll! I’m just maxin and relaxin lol!!! I have to write this essay about when I was the president of Texas and I’m sooo bored haha. A lot of you a-cracks have asked me if I’m writing this bitch by myself. Yeah right! What am I, some nerd? Do I look like Brock Obama [...]

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Back to the Howling Old Owl in the Woods: “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road” is Still Awesome

Posted by Katie Ehlers on Sat, Mar 6, 2010

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Elton John’s “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road” was released in 1973, and I was released in 1979, so I don’t consider it an exaggeration to say I have loved this song my entire life. It’s one of those tunes I didn’t quite understand as a kid, but got to me anyway. Because that’s what the best [...]

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Midnight Snack

Posted by Katie Ehlers on Sat, Jan 9, 2010

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This is not about the sweaty, coked-up, gold-toned 1970s music and comedy performance television show, “Burt Sugarman’s Midnight Special.” Nor is it about Guthy-Renker’s DVD collection of said program. This is about the infomercial for said DVDs of said television show. There is no possibility I will ever buy the DVDs. There are nineteen of them. [...]

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