The Contrarian

Satan's Stargate.

Our friend Tanner hipped us to this awesome YouTube clip of an odd British gentleman explaining how the Large Hadron Collider is a Gateway to the Old Gods. Actually, he calls it Satan's Stargate, but whatevs.

To be fair, the Hadron project has spurred some quasi-legitimate fears about accidental black holes. (Dvorsky examined the collider's existential risk factor not too long ago.) But a trans-dimensional portal through which the Nephilim will reenter  our realm? That's a new one. 

Favorite quote: "Allegedly the machine is to find a particle. . . nicknamed by the scientists or the Freemasons — same thing — as the God particle." And: "You could be seeing some flying saucers by this summer." The latter probably depend on this year's mushroom crop. . . right Jebson?.

Enjoy:

Brain Dharma.

Image: Alex Grey

David Brooks has a very interesting Op-Ed in today's New York Times, called "The Neural Buddhists." The piece posits a near future where advances in neuroscience lead to a new understanding of the transcendental experience. This means a major challenge to Judeo-Christian religious hegemony.

Instead of science reaffirming a trend towards materialism, it will present a broader view of mental processes and their mystical/ethical implications."The cognitive revolution is not going to end up undermining faith in God, it’s going end up challenging faith in the Bible," Brooks writes.

Scientists have more respect for elevated spiritual states. . . the mind seems to have the ability to transcend itself and merge with a larger presence that feels more real.

This new wave of research will not seep into the public realm in the form of militant atheism. Instead it will lead to what you might call neural Buddhism.

First, the self is not a fixed entity but a dynamic process of relationships. Second, underneath the patina of different religions, people around the world have common moral intuitions. Third, people are equipped to experience the sacred, to have moments of elevated experience when they transcend boundaries and overflow with love. Fourth, God can best be conceived as the nature one experiences at those moments, the unknowable total of all there is. . .

. . .the real challenge is going to come from people who feel the existence of the sacred, but who think that particular religions are just cultural artifacts built on top of universal human traits. It’s going to come from scientists whose beliefs overlap a bit with Buddhism.

I say right on. Read the full piece here.

Bitter Irony.

Sony/BMG Under Investigation for Software Piracy [WiredBlog]

I mean, do you even need to read it?

The Most Revolutionary Piece Of Music Production Software Ever.

If your a musician or producer, you must watch this video all the way through. Hell, even non-musicians should check it out:

I'm totally getting this the second it becomes available. I''ll never have to play but a single chord again. (I'll still do my rippin' leads the old fashioned way).

Chart.

Borrowed from Sentient Developments, who linked to a project involving a prosthetic device for a lost human instinct.

Phew!

Crazy-ass day. So busy my head was spinning. But at least it wasn't boring.

Part of the afternoon was spent up at the Senate for a briefing on the FCC's 700 MhZ auction. Basically, the government is following through with a 2005 deficit reduction bill that set a date of February 17, 2009 to finish the transition from analog to digital TV. This means broadcasters will be vacating a chunk of the spectrum in the "700 band."  The cool part is that signals on this band are able to travel long distances and penetrate buildings and concrete walls — perfect for high-speed internet and WI-FI.

One chunk of the 700, called the "C Block," has been put up for anonymous auction. There are provisions for maintaining "open access," meaning consumers could have more control over which devices they use with which carriers. At present, a few powerful telecoms control which phones work on their networks. They make deals with hardware manufacturers, and then lock you into contracts. Even after the contract expires, you're not typically able to bring your device to another provider. Of course, by then you've already bought the next shiny gadget.

Here's a useful analogy I heard: you don't have to buy a new computer when you switch ISPs, so why should it be any different in the wireless world?

Anyway, the auction is exciting, but there's doubt about whether it'll result in new entries to the field. Odds are, an incumbent like Verizon will win the bid. On the bright side, that company recently announced plans to make its entire network open. We'll see what the fine print looks like. Head to SavetheInternet.com to learn more about what you can do to preserve the public spectrum for YOUR interests, and not Big Telecom.

Oh, and OBAMA WON THE POTOMAC PRIMARIES! WOOT! WOOT! WOOT!

Op & Coming.

You do all know about Tape Op Magazine, right? God, I love it. Whether you're a pro recordist or duct tape-and-dreams type, you definitely need to get yourself a subscription. The best part? It's free.

And I can't tell you how many times the message board folks have bailed me out of a crisis. Good people.

You may also have heard about the annual Tape Op Conference, where the guys (and gals) with their hands on the knobs talk about all of the crazy changes in the music/recording world. Recently, the magazine decided to break off from the summit, which has been renamed PotLuckCon. This year's event takes place in New Orleans on June 6-8. I'm going as part of a Future of Music expedition. Should be a geeky good time.

Quick links:

Spies use YouTube to gather intel. Better change my username from Slave2Osama to something more innocuous like TeenGirl69.

Write yourself an e-mail to be sent to the future you at FutureMe.org. I guess you're supposed to think of it as a web-age time capsule. I haven't done it yet (I hardly expect my e-mail to stay the same forever), but I have pondered what I might say to an older, wiser me. Probably something about how much sexier I am.

Hot conspiracy theory: "Are the Bonnaroo Organizers Trying to Fake Out Led Zeppelin Fans?" [Idolator]

Comcast is The Devil.

Crappy service, high prices, anti-competitive market dominance, misleading broadband claims, poor technical support, annoyingly high-volume advertising, secretive (and possibly illegal) traffic "shaping," weak-ass On-Demand selection, piss-poor packaging structures, useless website.

And they can't even get someone to my house to add a service within the 4-hour window they quoted me TWO WEEKS AGO. You start to understand why Mona "The Hammer" Shaw took such drastic action.

People, I implore you: do not vote Republican (or even Libertarian). There needs to be stricter Federal regulation of all corporate entities doing business with the public spectrum. Sorry, but the the "market" can't "decide" this shit. Or else you get our current situation, in which consumer choice is strangled by profit-hungry monopolies and US broadband penetration is the laughing stock of the rest of the free world.

Your next President is gonna decide how the FCC is staffed. Let's make sure it's not with cronyist douchebags.

Oh, and FUCK COMCAST.

UPDATE:

The technician never came. He was supposed to be here at 11 AM. I called Comcast a total of 11 times. With each call, there was approx. 30 min. hold time. With each call, I was told that the they'd contacted dispatch and the technician would be ringing me directly within fifteen minutes. He never did.

On my 8th call, at 5 PM, I was on hold for around 20 minutes. The customer service rep came back on to tell me that the technician had come to my building at 4:45, and asked the concierge to be let up. The front desk supposedly called us but "we didn't answer." So the technician simply left.

I checked in with our wonderful concierge, Clyde, who told me that no one from Comcast came to our building today. They lied! When I called back, I was told a supervisor would ring me in a few minutes. Never happened. When I called back again, I was told that there was no way they could send back another technician, 'cause it was quittin' time. Nice.

On my 11th Comcast call, I finally spoke to a woman who actually gave a shit. She told me they could simply FedEx the DVR to us. Wow. And only after 8 hours and 11 calls!

It is my fondest wish that the new Democratic administration (preferably Barack Obama's) will put pressure on the FCC to revoke Comcast's franchise license. At the very least, Congress should hold hearings to investigate the company's monopolistic hold on the cable industry.

I encourage anyone who has had similar experiences to log them at www.ComcastMustDie.com, and to write your representative to alert them of the company's fraudulent and anti-competitive behavior. You can also file comments with the FCC urging Chairman Martin to take Comcast's neutral net violations seriously.

Thank you and goodnight.

After a Long Wonky Day, I Like to Unwind With a Little Catblogging!

This guy is just too cute, even without testicles:

I'm pretty pooped after a full day of policy tech talk at the Congressional Net Caucus. Pretty awesome event, I must say. I'll write more about it later, but if I had to pick the best part right now, it'd be Gigi Sohn from Public Knowledge going toe-to-to with Cary Sherman from the RIAA about ISP filtering schemes to curtail (yeah, right) illegal file-sharing. There were a couple of other folks on the panel, too. . . too tired to get into it at the moment.

Oh, and the discussion about the real-world policy, legal (and social) implications of Second Life was hilarious. And kinda creepy.

Stay tuned. . .

Report From the Front.

Hey there.

The new cat, who we've taken to calling Cornelius, has had his male reproductive organs truncated. I assure you this was, in fact, on purpose. He's now convalescing on his beloved kitty jungle gym.

Tomorrow is the big "State of the Net" Caucus here in Washing-town. I can't wait to mingle with the eggheads and tech-policy wonks. A thorough digital debriefing will surely follow.

Bye-bye, Giuliani! I guess 911 isn't enough to hang a campaign on, particularly when you look like a cross between Nosferatu and Montgomery Burns and you're running against the Plastic Fantastic, Mit Romney. Oh, and that old dude from the 'Nam.

Back in McCain's day, vacuum tubes were the hot new technology. Now they've just invented a transistor radio smaller than a grain of sand. No shit — it's made out of nanotubes!

Wold you be interested in downloading a half-million (17GB) photos stolen from MySpace profiles? If you answered yes, you're not alone.

Longtime U2 manager Paul McGuinness hates broadband, and thinks tech pioneers are "hippies." That's essentially what he said in his speech at MIDEM, the world's largest music industry conference. I agree with a lot of his points, but he did kinda come across like a blowhard. Here's the full text. It's definitely worth reading, as is Bob Lefsetz' predictably cranky response.

Remember a while back when I posted a link to a page cataloging various Presidential candidates' stances on tech issues? Well, here's an even better one, that also analyzes their views on related issues like intellectual property and copyright reform.

All Google wants to do is sell ads to the candidates. Well, besides controlling the world, bwah-hah-hah.

OK, that's all for now. Gotta watch those Florida returns.

PS: Sean, if you're reading this — I'm sorry I haven't yet returned your call. I'm a tremendous ass.